I hope you’ve been enjoying the Virtual Reality Trap video series to show you…
- its power over you,
- how to recognize it in your life,
- how to let it go, and
- what it looks like to live in the real world every day fully in your purpose and free of this Virtual Reality Trap!
Today I am going to share with you a simple step by step system to start taking back your life from this crazy way of living!!!
Does this sound familiar?
You wake up in the morning and feel great under the covers all warm and snuggly still in dreamland that is the natural state of your brain, dreaming and playing like a child. But then your adult memory and problem solving brain that runs your day begins to stir. It starts you off with “Hey stupid, you can’t be laying here, it’s Monday and you have 20 things to do before you even leave for work.”
That kicks your body into stress mode right away, your cortisol and blood pressure leap not based on anything in your bedroom, but to the virtual reality you are creating in your head. This is a crazy way to start the day!
But that is not all, your virtual reality mind is just about to kick into overdrive as you step out of bed onto the floor you get a huge sinking feeling in your stomach, and BAM! In your mind you have an image of the person you are having the biggest conflict with, or the project that you are behind on at work… and it looks huge and ugly.
You get even more stressed and that conflict (that is not even in your bedroom) literally takes up 98% of your thinking at that moment and your anxiety levels starts the day off at a 7 or 8 out of 10. And you call this a normal Monday!!
We need to change this! So what is the real problem and how do we solve this?
These are the steps you need to take to free yourself from the Virtual Reality Trap!
Start with a blank sheet of paper (you might want a legal pad if you’ve got one) and write down all of your problems, issues, wishes, dreams in your relationships, business and life (i.e. things you have and don’t want, things you don’t have and do want, and anything that might make your to-do list, and any past traumas or losses that bother you that take up much of your thinking every day or things you have to do right now.) There should be at least 20-30 items on your list.
If there is anything on your list that does not stress you even a little, take it off by drawing a line through it.
On a new blank sheet of paper, draw three columns. Label the columns: “Right Now Issues”, “Virtual Realty Problems” and “Life issues.”
Acknowledge that everything on your list you see as a problem, creates a level of stress just thinking about it and therefore fits into the “Virtual Reality Problems” column and are the bricks that build your personal Virtual Reality Trap. Also acknowledge that much of what is on your list is not happening in the room you are in right now, and therefore is being kept alive only in your thoughts. As a result, transfer all of the items into the Virtual Reality Problems column on your second page from your first page.
The work begins: process of elimination.
1) Look at the “Virtual Reality Problem” list and see what might move onto the “Life Issues” column that represent your personal truth and reality. Some examples might be that you have to walk with a cane, or you have an allergy to certain foods or pollen, you are in the middle of a divorce, your child is on drugs, you drink too much, you are overweight, you are out of money, you have an injury or illness, you got robbed, you have a trauma history that makes you not trust others now, you are 50 and want to change careers to something more spiritual, you are creative but not organized, you are inherently lazy, you can never say no and get treated like a doormat, you are a workaholic, you are too sensitive, etc.
Life issues seen as problems range from external stuff happening right now to internal awareness of who you are that you don’t want to be or don’t want to show.
The key with life issues is that you have two choices, accept the truth and let them inform your life and choices in each moment or wish they were not real and be crazy.
Your Virtual Reality Trap keeps you thinking that you, and life, should be different. Rather than knowing that where you are, and who you are is the only place, you have to now choose to move forward and share your greatness.
2) Go back to what is left on the list and look for items that need to be dealt with right now. If it is standing in front of you, or is outside your door, take them out of “Virtual Realty Problems” and put them into “Right Now Issues.” Then, put down your pen and go do them.
If they must be done now, deal with them if you can. i.e. If the laundry machine is leaking on the floor, or you have a report due and this is the only time you have to work on it, the IRS is at the door, you need an X-ray of stubbed toe, children are starving and dying in 3rd world countries, or the congress is about to let a Chemical Company decide what it best for us nutritionally.
Anything that needs immediate attention, deal with them now. Things that are really happening now, “Right Now Issues” also give you two simple choices, do something about them, or choose not to. Then you move on.
THIS IS KEY: The more you accept who you are in #1- “Life Issues” the easier it will be to decide how you will deal with “Right Now Issues”
They only stay “Virtual Reality Problems” when you don’t see your choices, you wish it wasn’t happening, you wish you could do more than you can, you hope it goes away without you doing anything, or you pretend it’s not important.
Not dealing with things that are “Right Now Issues” will almost always lead to compounded issues and lots more Virtual Reality Problems and anxiety because you did not deal with them.
If you have a problem on your list you do not have the resources to handle, like you don’t have the time to go back for you Masters degree, make the choice to let it go and scratch it off your list. Anything you really can’t do that you keep hoping for, drains you and makes you suffer.
3) Lastly, THE SHOCKING TRUTH IS…. (drum role please)
THERE ARE NO SUCH THINGS AS PROBLEMS OUTSIDE OF YOUR MIND! There is just life happening, that you accept, deal with or don’t deal with.
Look what is left on the Virtual Reality Problem list and recognize that if you dig deep, you will find that they all fit in either #1 or #2. Some are seen as problems because you are not accepting your reality, gifts or limitations, or they are seen as problems. Not dealing with reality, your gifts and limitations leaves you unable to make the important daily choices you need to make to live your highest purpose.
Scratch them all from the Virtual Reality Problem column, put them in in the right column.
Be sure to look for video #5 next week where I will share how to use those life issues to totally transform your life.